directed by: Keenen Ivory Wayans
starring: Jon Abrahams, Carmen Electra, Shannon Elizabeth, Anna Faris, Kurt Fuller, Regina Hall (I), Lochlyn Munr, Cheri Oteri, Dave Sheridan (I), Marlon Wayans, Shawn Wayans , Dan Joffre, Andrea Nemeth, Frank B. Moore, Giacomo Baessato
"Watching television shows doesn't make you violent... cancelling television shows makes you violent!"
- One of the film's would be killers gives his views of psychopathic behavior!
[review by Joseph Henson]
SCARY MOVIE, directed by Wayans number #72688, has it's moments. When it's funny (sadly this is not very often) it's side-splittingly funny, but when it falls on it's face (which is ninety percent of the time) it breaks it's fuckin' cheek bones. I mean, how can you spoof a spoof?
The darn Wayanses attempt to do so, but they don't seem to take an interest in the slasher sub-genre the way Wes Craven and Kevin Williamson had done in 96' with SCREAM (which is the spoof this movie is spoofing, among others) - no, instead they're like bullies with nothing better to do than to earn a quick buck. And, as I write this review and finish watching the film on DVD, talks are about for a sequel. Sigh.
The opening scene comes in just like SCREAM, and a Drew Barrymore substitute (the confused and hopeless Carmen Electra) sits alone in her home making popcorn and flatulating at every turn, when a husky voiced stranger gives her a ring, telling her he's going to rip out her insides, etc, you know the drill. What follows is mildy comical, with a somewhat amusing wink at the naked and wet slasher victim, quickly and swiftly ruined by turning into unfunny slapstick with various sexual innuendos thrown in for (bad?) measure. What should happen next but, yeah, it's SCREAM, I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER, THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT and about thirty other unfunny parodies thrown in to pad out the film's running time. The movie even goes so far as to stealing dialogue from SCREAM, and seems to be doing so due to, hmmm, perhaps a lack of inspiration, and not to spoof? The Wayans, who I usually find funny in certain things, didn't do their homework this time around.
Like I said before, SCARY MOVIE and the masterminds behind it all seem to have very little interest in the genre they are skewering. Movies like AIRPLANE and the NAKED GUN series worked so well because all involved seemed to have an affection for their targets, but the Wayans boys only seem desperate for some quick cash. That's not to say the film isn't an entire waste, no, I did laugh quite a few times even though I really shouldn't have. The movie parodies and retard jokes fell flatter than a three day old opened beer can, but I did laugh, and I admit I am a sucker for this low brow type of humor, at the various and not-so-subtle gay and dick jokes thrown in. Shawn Wayans, playing a jock who is almost out of the closet, steals the movie as scene after scene calls for him to make sly remarks about his secretive sexuality, and the dick jokes came fast and furious, some funny, some downright hilarious - one scene that spoofs the opening murder scene of SCREAM 2 has to be seen to be believed, as does a take of Neve Campbell and Skeet Ulrich's love sex scene in SCREAM.
This type of humor isn't for everyone, and I do admit it's somewhat lower than low to most, but you have to admit it IS funnier, and I pray to the heavens that someone will agree with me here, than the overused and oh so unfunny cliches of stoners and potheads, something SCARY MOVIE relied on heavily, and the one thing that really put me in a bad mood with this film. When did this become funny? Was I in the bathroom reading a book about gay/dick jokes? Am I confused? I just don't get it. If I see a movie about slacker potheads again it will be too soon. In my humble opinion, the movie MIGHT have sat better with me without this brand of humor, and I state again this is only one man's opinion. I just don't find it very funny (a toothache is even funnier to me!).
There's other little moments that rise a smile here and there, including a very funny USUAL SUSPECTS turn near the end, but overall the film doesn't have enough laughs to carry itself along and the narrative (which I suppose we're supposed to forget about) is so sloppy it's not even straight enough to keep the already seldomly funny jokes in order.
Barely recommended for gay and dick joke enthusiasts, Wayans fans, Carmen Electra in the near buff and, sigh, those who think slackers puffin' the wacky tobacky is funny - otherwise be very warned - SCARY MOVIE ain't for all tastes!
BODYCOUNT 10 female:6 / male:4
1) Female stabbed in breast implant then run over by speeding car
2) Male dumped into a river (in flashback)
3) Male has throat slit
4) Female stabbed to death
5) Female decapitated
6) Female stabbed to death
7) Female crushed by garage door
8) Male shot
9) Male shot
10) Female run over by speeding car